"(Static)Mike Toole....(static)....please abandon the Ice Cream Social and attach the safety harness to your person, Over."-Helicopter guy.
Lisa did a good job trying to translate our little "scenario" into writing. Except you forgot one thing- Edward Burns feels he should be spared from New York City based on the fact that he is a huger-than-life Megastar!!
"WAIT!!! Didn't you see 'She's the One'??!?!" Burns, running at top speed grabs the ropes attached to the safety harness and ties it tightly to his belt."Tell Christy TURLINGTON I LOVE HERRRRRRRRRRR.....uhhh!" Edward Burns slams face first into the side of a van, with enough force to briefly knock the vehicle up on two tires!
Later on in the trip, we see Mike Toole peeling Cherry-flavored outer space shapes from the cellophane of his fruit Roll-up. "Hey! Look Ed, it's a spaceship! Blast off to Planet Fruit!!" No reply from Edward Burn's limp, lifeless body dangling below.
"Whoa, looks like there's a little rain coming our way! Better Zip up your jacket, Ed!!" Toole buttons his coat and tucks his hands into the pockets, feeling rather satisfied from his "meal" of processed fruit pieces. No reply from Edward Burn's limp, lifeless body dangling below.