Friday, September 16, 2005

Since I have been posting mainly pictures for the past few weeks, I decided those of you who read this blog might like to actually, you know, READ. So I'm making a list of things about myself, stuff that some of you may know, and some of you may not know. Here goes.
1. I watch The Golden Girls every night before bed. Every goddamn night. I've seen every episode like 100 times, and it's not like an obsessive thing, it's completely a comfort thing. Like being at grandma's house or something. Sometimes though I turn off the tv, for Kane's sake. I don't want him to start to grow a vagina just because I must watch GG.
2. When I was about 9, my friend Amy and I caught a little turtle once by Compton's Creek and put him in a tupperware bowl and gave him some leaves and some black pepper(?) to eat. He was our pet for only 1 day though, because he died.
3. I once hid from the cops by rolling underneath my own car and covering myself with leaves!
4. Sometimes I think about quitting everything and becoming a chef.
5. I would love to name my future children Maggie or Jack. But since Kane's last name is Black, my kid's name would be Jack Black, and that's just stupid.
6. At least once every day I think about the gap in my front teeth, and that if it gets any bigger, I'll look like Madonna during her ghetto faze. This upsets me.
7. One time Lisa and I made this younger girl in our neighborhood go into the woods in the middle of a thunder and lightning storm to "scare away the killer woodchucks". We made up this whole story about how the whole town was doomed, and she was the only one who could save us by going into the woods and screaming "Go AWAY!" 3 times during a lightning storm. She was so scared, and cried alot. She did it though, and you know what? No killer woodchucks ever invaded Belford, New Jersey. That little girl saved our whole town.
8. When I tell people I used to work at Leslie Pools, I usually don't tell them how most of the time me and my friends just got stoned, and cooked up some burgers (and the occasional steak) on a portable grill we set up out back, then took turns taking naps on some solar covers. Best summer job ever.
9. The first time I drove, I very nearly crashed my friend Jen's car into a building.
10. After I got my license, I crashed my car into a building.
11. Only a few people will ever hear my Shirley Temple impression. My real one, that is. Those who have heard it, I'll do it for you, but pleeeeeease don't tell anyone about it.
12. I used to have crushes on the following actors: Christian Bale(well, maybe a little bit still), Christian Slater, Dicrapio, Seth Green, Heath Ledger, James Marsters (as SPIKE, Lengli!!), Johnny Depp(no kidding.), John Corbett, and...........gulp.........Jeff Goldblum. Shut up, I was in 7th grade for god's sake!! I didn't know!!!!
13. I can communicate with my cat Fizzie by just using facial expressions. I'm also teaching him how to fetch. Just like I taught my other cat Riley, although he doesn't do it as much anymore. He's too cool for that sort of thing now, I guess.
14. I'm thinking about going back and erasing #12!
15. When I first lived alone, I had a pile of dirty laundry in the closet of my old apartment that I left for so long, that there was actually some sort of larvae-looking thing growing inside of a set of sheets. I threw them away.
16. One time I couldn't sleep so I tried to tap dance on a sheet of glass from a broken poster frame in the middle of the night (I thought it would tire me out!!) and smashed it. I wore my tap shoes to walk the glass out to the dumpster at like 3 in the morning, and probably woke up everyone in the apartment complex in the process. I then fell asleep on the foot of my bed, fully dressed, with my hands a little bloodied from the broken glass and still wearing the tap shoes.
17. I get the song "Holy Diver" by Dio stuck in my head at least once or twice a week. This has been going on for like 2 months!
18. I can't think of anything else to write.

5 comments:

Paul said...

what gap in your teeth?

Robert said...

I like Golden Girls!! It's a good show. :)

lengli said...

A little message from James to me to you....

PS - James says "Sorry So Small", only he just uses one big 'S' to spell all three words.

Lisa Armsweat said...

Lengli's on a roll lately with the photoshop comedy. Hoooo boy!
Also, I still feel kind of bad about the killer woodchuck thing with Amy. I do think we did a good thing for her self-esteem in the long run, but I wonder about the lying-to-her and the making-her-cry part.
Which one of us is going to be the first to write about the Mulheisen's, and "JASON!"? My vote's for you to tell some tales about the round-heads.

lengli said...

No kidding, I can't stop! You girls (and Spike and Carol Channing of course) just inspire me, what more can I say.